I just read a good point.
Something obvious, but had never been pointed out to me.
If you knew you only had a day...
or even 12 hours to live,
what would you do?
What did Jesus do?
'He took bread, gave thanks,
and broke it and gave it to them...”
He gave thanks.
In order to honor all that had been,
in order to help with the fear he faced,
and in order to get him through the tough time ahead,
he gave thanks.
In the original Greek, that "gave thanks"
is written "eucharisteo."
The root of that word is the same as for
thanksgiving, grace and joy.
Thanksgiving. Grace. Joy.
Looking to wind up this (long) journey I've been on,
dealing with post-traumatic stress disorder,
facing "the evil one" getting out of prison this year,
learning to unlearn all of the poison and lies that were
planted in my head through all of the abuse,
learning to forgive myself for what were bad decisions on
my part that lead to pain and suffering not only for myself,
but for my kids.
Learning (still learning) to overcome the shame and unworthiness
that comes from years of an abuser speaking lies into your life,
and then years of the devil whispering those same lies into your ears...
all of that.
I'm looking to wrap up all of that.
In order to help battle the fear and uncertainty,
to help heal the wounds and move me to the next level...
Don't get me wrong,
I'm always grateful.
God is good, even on my bad days.
I am blessed and I know it.
However, even if my subconscious
is always in a stance of gratitude,
I want to to make a conscious effort to be grateful.
Train my mind to not only be consciously aware of the blessings,
but to verbalize those blessings.
Because when you verbalize things, put them in writing,
it gives them power.
So, for today, my very first post of thanksgiving,
I will say this...
I am eternally grateful for the multitude of beautiful
people who have stood by me,
and spoken truth into my life,
when the devil was fighting hard
to speak lies.
Hugs during tears,
countless hours of talking and working-out the issues in my brain,
words of support, love and reminders
that I am not those names I was called,
not unworthy, not a bad mother, partner, friend, human being.
"Do You Think I'm Beautiful?"
says that sometimes when you're not willing or able to listen to God
tell you how beautiful you are,
He will send you someone who you are willing to listen to.
So for all you friend-warriors who have stood by me
and continued to love me through the crazy times,
I am thankful for you.
lurve you, xoxo v.