9.18.2010

Are we there yet?


The problem with being busy is that I always have all of these things happen where I'm all, "OOOOH! I've GOT to write about this!"  And then by the time I sit in front of my computer.... blank.  Nothing.  I know I've lived a lot of life this week & all kind of great shit happened, but what happened to it all?  *shrugging shoulders*  Nope, by the end of the week, my brain is the consistency of baby cereal & not much good for writing.

I'm definitely still getting used to this whole dayshift thing.  You know what has surprised me the most about it?  Okay, don't laugh.... sunlight.  Okay, go ahead and laugh.  See, for years now, I have slept all day & woken up in the afternoon when it is still daylight, so of course I know what daylight looks like.  I might even sometimes have to wear sunglasses.  But sunlight (nearly setting; dusk) is NOT the same as sunshine at say, ten o'clock in the morning!  WHO KNEW??  I had no idea!  And I'm fully aware how retarded that makes me sound.  Seriously though, I've been all like "wtf is THIS?"  And i HAVE to wear sunglasses, it's simply a must in the full Phoenix sunlight.  Yeah, totally had no idea and am not really loving it so far.  But I'll live.  That or it will burn my corneas.

Work is going good.  I'm still in new employee orientation, which sucks butt.  I mean, in one sense it's easy money, plus there are a TON of classes, so I've learned a lot, but most of it is held on the other side of town & rush-hour traffic is no joke around here.  The other day it took me two hours to go 40 miles because there was an accident.  So with drive time, I'm working 10-12 hours every day (instead of the 3 days I'm used to) and that does NOT make for a happy V.  I'm tired and I'm cranky and I've been having to sit so much in the past few weeks that my hips are killing me!  I had no idea sitting would make my hips hurt like that.  That and my elbows hurt from leaning forward with them on the table so much.  Paul started his new job this week too, which is VERY physically demanding, so put us together and we're like a bunch of old decrepit, crippled people.

I hope it passes soon because I feel like we have no life right now.  I feel like we never get to see each other, never get any alone time, etc etc.  I'm bored and I'm feeling a little neglected right now & it's just because life is so busy.  But, just ask those who have experienced it.... I'm PMS'ing right now, which means I take EVERYTHING personally & as a sign of rejection.  So although my brain knows that it's jut because things are so busy & bodies are so achey, my emotions interpret it as something's wrong.  It's not like writing this is going to clarify anything with or for him though, because he DOESN'T READ MY BLOG (side eye).

I know: *gasp*.  It leaves me with my jaw dropped.  Is there an icon for that?  Insert that shit here.  Yep, nothing I've ever acted too concerned about (to his face), but behind his back (and on my blog) I'm all like wtf?  Are you kidding me?  Don't you want to get to know me?  Because this is where the real shit is.  If he had a blog, you'd better believe I would be up one side of that thing and down the other.  I would start at day one and work my way through.  And then I would hack his password to get inside and see what he's written that's NOT published!  lol  Just kidding (or am I?).

I've mentioned it in passing a few times and he just kind of shrugs his shoulders and acts totally unconcerned.  He says, "I think I have the address of it somewhere.  Maybe I'll glance at it someday.  I'll be able to find it if I want to."  *blank stare*  Okaaayyyyyy..... different strokes for different folks, I guess.  But if I'm laying it all out there, I'd have to say that's a red flag for me.  I want a man who is INTO me.  Who wants to know how my brain works and is fascinated with said brain.  I want a man who gives me good brain in return.  Oh well, he is indeed a very good man and treats me well, so I don't want anyone to think for even a moment that I'm shit-talking him, so I'll move on.  But yeah, all of THIS *moving hands in a big circle*?  A bit of an eyebrow raiser for me.

Hmmm, let's see.  What else?  Oh, I have irritating neighbors that don't know how to clean up their dog's crap now.  Yeah, that's been fun (and smelly).

My house is officially decorated for fall now.  Fake leaves and pumpkins ABLAZE.  I wish the weather reflected this.  As I type this, it's 104 degrees outside, which is kind of nice because it's cooler than it's been.  I'm ready for it to get significantly cooler though.  I'm ready to have my windows open, blowing fresh air all through this place.  Is there anything worse than a stagnant house?  Ick.  I want fresh and clean with moving air.  I'm also tired of my electric bill being so high because of constantly running.

Okay, enough whining.  Hope you all had a great week.  I'm back to the grind in two short days. *sigh*  I can't WAIT to get on my regular schedule!  It might be more work, but at least I will have a more flexible schedule and hopefully *fingers crossed!* will be able to be home by the time the kids get home every day.  That will be awesome.

Okay, later taters.
xoxo veronica

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