Tonight's a rough night. The kids are at a friend's house spending the night so I don't really have to be okay for their sake and I'm beginning to melt down just a little bit. I went and had dinner with the girls at Panera's and didn't even really enjoy the food (and I love it there). Allison called me as I was pulling in the driveway to ask me if I was okay because she could tell that something was wrong and I couldn't even really talk because I was starting to cry. I'm not missing him, I'm missing the idea of him. I'm sad that this entire waste of my time and my life has happened and I'm pissed at him for doing this but I think even more than that I'm pissed at myself for doing this AGAIN. It's so much easier to just stay alone and keep the walls up. Screw him, screw this and screw life. The biggest temptation I'm facing tonight is walking over to Taggarts and drowning my sorrows. Oh, and I took my wedding rings off. Let freedom ring.
Tonight's a rough night. The kids are at a friend's house spending the night so I don't really have to be okay for their sake and I'm beginning to melt down just a little bit. I went and had dinner with the girls at Panera's and didn't even really enjoy the food (and I love it there). Allison called me as I was pulling in the driveway to ask me if I was okay because she could tell that something was wrong and I couldn't even really talk because I was starting to cry. I'm not missing him, I'm missing the idea of him. I'm sad that this entire waste of my time and my life has happened and I'm pissed at him for doing this but I think even more than that I'm pissed at myself for doing this AGAIN. It's so much easier to just stay alone and keep the walls up. Screw him, screw this and screw life. The biggest temptation I'm facing tonight is walking over to Taggarts and drowning my sorrows. Oh, and I took my wedding rings off. Let freedom ring.