Lately

What's up yo? How is everyone doing lately? Everything here is ok...for now anyways. lol Does anything ever really stay ok permanently? Um, no. So I'm satisfied with today being ok. :) Just thought I'd update those who care on what's going on in my life.

I'm LOVING my new job. Love isn't even a strong enough word! lol I am so blessed to have my job. It's awesome and of course I see all of my old friends just about as much now as I ever did before. They're all total haters because I get to sit there doing some paperwork while they're still running their butts off and answering doctor's calls. Poor them. ;)

The kids are all home now...and Maddie talks just as much as she did when she left. LOL I kind of miss Darren, but things are so peaceful here with just the three girls. Maybe I'll decide to let him stay there and see how it works out. I haven't made up my mind yet, but this peace thing is pretty nice!

My computer is STILL AT BEST BUY!!!! *grrrrr* I'm so mad about that I don't even know what to say about it. It's been there since June 27th or something like that. It gets shipped here then there. It sits for days on end with no updates. I've been on the phone with corporate headquarters all week complaining and putting my foot down. They supposedly "expedited" my order....yeah whatever, that was a big fat joke! It sat for FIVE days waiting for shipping because they "didn't have a shipping container." Then it took NINE days to fed-ex it to Kentucky. It got there on the 7th of this month and they're still looking at it. AGAIN. STILL. So I reminded them that they aren't doing me any favors and that this is an extended warranty that I paid for...and that I'm certainly not getting my money's worth. He responded with "Ma'am, I just don't know what to tell you other than we're sorry." I said "you're going to tell me that you're sending me at least a gift card!!" I mean come on! Hook a sister up for putting up with this crap! So I got a $100 dollar gift card in the mail today! woohoo! The first bit of justice since this mess started! lol We went shopping tonight to blow off my frustrated steam over my computer and to shoot the geek squad some dirty looks while I was there. I bought Scott a new coffee pot since he broke the pot of our old one a few weeks ago. Did you know that a replacement pot is like $20?? That's craziness. It's just as well to buy a new one! On top of that I bought a few cd's that I've been wanting to get. I always download some of the songs and then if I like them enough I buy the actual album. I got Corinne Bailey Rae, James Morrison, Justin Timberlake and Big Daddy Weave. I put back the new Maroon Five so that we could get the coffee pot....I'm such a nice wife! When we got home he made perogies (I'm too cool for spell check so I have no idea if that's how to spell that! lol). By the way, just so you all know.... I happen to be married to the BEST perogie cooker!!! No kidding. He doesn't actually MAKE them...I could care less about that. Let Mrs. T's do the work and make the mess! But the way he cooks them and seasons them??? Oh my gosh. MMMM.

Allison and I have decided to make candles again this year. So FYI....candle sale coming your way next month!! We're going to be doing a fall and Christmas sale with three scents for each. We're doing a few of our most popular and requested scents like Harvest, Cider, Cranberry and Gingerbread and then we're also adding a few new ones. More details to come! :) I can't wait though! My house is going to smell soooo good!!!

The chemo is going ok. Side effects aren't as bad as I was afraid of so that's good. I am nauseous alot and the fatigue can be overwhelming. I thought I was tired before! Certain days out of the week I can be EXTREMELY tired. I can be up for about a half-hour max before I have to lay back down for 15 or 20 minutes. I'm not noticing any benefit from it yet at all unfortunately. I actually feel alot worse as far as the lupus goes. I haven't taken any steroids since I started the chemo five weeks ago and I am having alot more pain in my joints and inflammation. So really I don't know if the fatigue is from the chemo or just from the bad lupus flare. Unfortunately I also have a bad infection that I'm HEAVY antibiotics for. It's the tooth abcess that I've had since Easter. I even had the tooth pulled to see if that would help and it didn't. I've gone through FIVE rounds of amoxicillin and this is my second round of high-dose clindamycin. I was referred to an infectious disease doctor and she gave me the meds and then referred me to an oral surgeon because she said I'll have to have oral surgery to clean it out and make sure I don't have osteomylitis (infection of the bone). If it doesn't stop after that then I have to start having IV antibiotics. This sucks so bad! It's a big sucky viscious circle because the infection and the meds have my immune system in an uproar (hence lupus flare-up)... so I'm on the chemo to lessen my immune system so the lupus won't be so bad, but then I don't have as much of an immune system to kick this infections butt very quickly. So please pray for my health. STILL.

On a final note.... For the first time in five years I sent the evil one a letter. Yep, you heard me. Actually it wasn't a mere letter...it was quite the nastygram. I like to check every now and then to make sure that he is still tucked away in Marion prison so the world can sleep in peace for a few more years. Last night I checked on him and he was still there....good. So I went to the local court's site and checked on the case just to make sure there weren't any updates..... and there were. HE'S TRYING TO GET OUT EARLY!!!!! He filed for a "judicial release" or something like that...which is basically requesting early release for good behavior. OH HELL NO!!! They turned him down....PRAISE GOD....but what makes me so mad is that they didn't even notify me!!! I filled out one of those victim notification forms when he first went in and I guess it didn't do any good! I'm supposed to be notified and be able to speak on Courtney's behalf after any request that he makes. They'll be hearing from me too...have no doubt about that! I was LIVID. I really tried not to worry about it all night but I did anyways. I spent the night praying about handing it over to the Lord and for him to please help me not to think about it and worry about it. I know that God has promised to take care of us and protect us...and I have not even a drop of doubt that he will...but for some reason the video player in my head wouldn't quit playing scenarios of him getting out. I WOULDN'T HAVE EVEN KNOWN HE WAS OUT if they had approved his request!!! He could've just shown up at my door. He could walk right in. He could kidnap my girls right out of my yard! I need to quit talking about it because I can feel the panic coming over me like a wave and the tears are already here again. I have to just let God have it. NO WEAPON FORMED AGAINST ME SHALL PROSPER. But before I handed it back to God I wrote the evil one a letter. ;) I went off on him and basically said HOW DARE YOU! How dare you try to get out early! You have been a bully and a coward since the day I met you and have done nothing but wreak terror on me and my children. The only thing that's brought me even a little bit closer to forgiving you is that you had admitted what you had done and were serving your time like the "man" you're supposed to be! Don't you even THINK about taking that small amount of justice away from us! MAKE NO MISTAKE ABOUT IT...I have had five years to detox from you and I am even MORE protective of my family than I was then! If you even THINK about applying to get out early again, my face and my name will HAUNT you. I will be there to speak every single time. If it takes my dying breath I will make sure that you sit there until December 2011 like you're supposed to! I would get more if I could! I was being GENEROUS by not seeking life in prison like the prosecutors wanted me to. etc., etc.

All Scott said after he read it was "wow." I never thought I would ever write or speak to him again. I have this righteous indignation that was reignited in me last night that I havn't felt in several years now. I told him that he needs to get his life right with God, because if he had already done that he wouldn't be trying to get a "get out of jail free card." Pheww. God's the only thing that can truly protect us.... or change him.